The Struggle Continues
Photo by Alena Darmel from Pexels
It was nice to feel somewhat normal again. After my personal experience with depression, I have even more respect and compassion for those to whom this is an ongoing experience.
But the battle was far from over. I still hadn’t addressed my eating habits. At the time, I honestly felt that there were so many other things to keep afloat in my life, that wasn’t as important. I was sorely mistaken.
Soon, my day began to revolve around food.
It was intensified being home all day with three young children requesting frequent visits to the pantry. Somehow, I felt like that was my permission to enjoy too, even if I had just eaten shortly before. I would hope for opportunities to run errands alone so that I could indulge in a treat without guilt…or evidence. It got so bad at one point, that I was no longer eating for energy, or satisfaction, it was a mindless habit that seemed to help me cope when I felt like things were outside of my control.
Compared to all the other things I could potentially do to ruin my life and body; this doesn’t sound too bad huh? Exactly what I was thinking. That’s the thing we often forget though. Sure, there are worse things that people can do, but the bible doesn’t give us commands based on how bad the sin is. The Bible talks about what sin breeds in our lives, however and gluttony, which means the habitual greed or excess in eating, is a sin.
“Sodom’s sins were pride, gluttony, and laziness…” -Ezekiel 16:49
“…Don’t you realize that this sin is like a little yeast that spreads through the whole batch of dough?” -Jonah 5:6
“Temptation comes from our own desires, which entice us and drag us away. These desires give birth to sinful actions. And when sin is allowed to grow, it gives birth to death.” -James 1:15
Unchecked sin in our lives creates a domino effect.
It seeps into other areas and desensitizes us into compromise. Before I knew it, I was entertaining ideas that I previously wouldn’t have. One area that struggled as a result of my unrepentance was my household, to include my marriage. Overindulgence on social media without filtering meant a constant intake of messages that were contrary to biblical truth, yet so satisfying for my itching ears that wanted to hear about anything that centered the focus on me. The messages that seemed to resonate most at that time was “Do you sis!” “Put yourself first.” “Don’t let anything ruin your happiness.”
As I looked around at my seemingly mundane life as a stay-at-home wife and mom who homeschooled, I didn’t feel so happy. I began entertaining the idea that there had to be something better. I was discontent with my home, my husband, and even my church. Surely God created me for more than this…
